Growing in or Growing out of Love


They were in love – the so called truly, madly and deeply love. They held each other’s hands firmly and  started on their  life journey of togetherness.

Your dreams are mine and mine yours or now it’s just ours” – they vowed to one another. Everything seemed just so very perfect. They were in sync, in harmony and in peace. Now if you are expecting a twist to the script, like an entry of a villian – there isn’t one. So no blaming the parents, society or a possible third person.

As they settled in, they started accumulating – networks and networths. “Less baggage more comfort” – but for all practical purposes, the baggage gets more for most of us in due course of time. The travel isn’t always plain meadows but you also tend to get the unexpected rough terrains. Well, they decided to divide and conquer. One took the heavier baggage and slowed down the pace (lets call this better half “S” and the faster one “F” for ease of reference).

“S” let “F” travel at a much higher pace and explore more. They were still happy with what they conquered cumulatively. The difference in pace brought slight distance between them but still they were at a distance where they could call each other and make sure they knew how each one was doing. As time passed, “F” reached greater heights – the world view, altitude and experience was totally different at that level.”F” started telling “S” about the valley and the flowers that “F” could see, but as “S” was much below still coping with the weight didn’t quite relate to what “F” said.

 “Was our love not real? Were we not meant for a lifetime – “S “doesn’t seem to be the same person anymore”  – “F” became restless, and so did “S”.

It’s true they didn’t start as “S” and “F” but along their journey one became “S” and the other “F”. This was a consensual decision but hardly did they realize what the decision would do to them. Should “S” not have agreed to slow down?

Well, tons of questions that we could discuss and debate forever. What needs to be considered in a long term Soul Relationship is –

What do we make of  one another in the due course of the life journey that we wholeheartedly plan to travel together?And whatever person we become in this due course – is it the better version of us ? Would this version still relate to each other?

Love should let both the individuals grow and if the growth is along the same direction – the travel is fun, even if it means covering rough terrains together.

 

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4 Comments Add yours

  1. Charles says:

    Really interesting blog that got me thinking deep. Keep writing. Good job.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. SoulCafe says:

      Thanks a lot Charles

      Like

  2. prisam says:

    Are you a researcher..can I know what is your educational background..have you presented any scientific paper on this topic and defended it..you have any scientific backing to support your hypothesis..otherwise you should refrain from writing such blogs..probably stick to writing movie blogs like your earlier ones..cos writing such blogs can negatively influence the people who are reading it..i do not agree with your comparison and suggest you to write about lighter topics to satisfy your intellectual thirst.

    Like

    1. SoulCafe says:

      Hi Prisam – This isn’t a movie blog as the name suggests – it’s a blog on various aspects of human relationships/human behavior. I do a lot of research before I put forward an article and there is no new theory I have mentioned but the theories mentioned already exist from Maslows to Jung. I really didn’t understand how these posts would negatively influence people. As an individual I do believe I have the freedom of expression and this is not just to satisfy my intellectual thirst. No article here promotes anything negative, I am sorry to hear you felt otherwise. As individual we need to move beyond talking/readin/ writing just on movies and entertainment..we do have quite a lot of that. This blog isn’t meant for that. I don’t expect everyone to agree to my post but if at least it makes one ponder that’s great.
      So once again – all theories mentioned are already published and well known, there is no negativity that is intended and I believe it impacts positively in a relaionship if one is aware of the human behavior aspects and I’m okay if someone disagrees, it’s your personal right and freedom. Thanks for reaching out!

      Like

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